theStud3nt

Prof. Fabled Kari

School of life

15 January 2021

Where I'm Supposed to Be

Thought of the week 

When I was growing up and really starting to get serious about music, my mom asked me if I would make music for free for the rest of my life if money were not an issue. Yes. In fact, I would pay someone for the rest of my life to allow me to make music if I could, and money was not an issue. The problem is, money is an issue and I have no real job. I haven’t had a job since I was laid off due to the Corona outbreak in March 2019 it’s almost been a year since I was laid off and honestly, I don’t wanna go back to work. I’ve been devoting my time to making and promoting music and I can’t see myself doing that If I have to work 30-40 hours a week at a restaurant an hour away from where I live.  I’ve made so much progress on my dreams from making a blog and website, to actively producing music and writing songs, to planing a virtual concert and 3 albums to be released this coming summer. YES! I said THREE ALBUMS. All at the same time. Everything is planned out and ready to go. So why do I feel like such a failure? I’m doing what I said I would do. I’m making music despite not making a single cent on it. I’m spending more money on promotion, and studio time, than I am spending on food and rent. Unemployment is keeping me from being homeless and my savings are quickly being drained so I can release these albums. I still feel like I’m missing something. I still find it hard to get out of bed sometimes and I panic about not having an income. I feel all of these emotions yet… I feel I’m right where I’m supposed to be. I do not want to be doing anything else. The money would be nice of course, but nothing can compare to listening to the progress I made on a song from 10 pm to 2 Am the night before and continuing to work the next morning. I guess my thought of this week is having no money is a way to test where your priorities are.   

Song and Lyric of the Week 

“the more money we come across the more problems we see” 

 You guys remember that Biggie Smalls song “Mo Money Mo Problems?” Go to Spotify or youtube or whatever and listen to the song and try not to feel better for a moment. This song brings me ease and a calm nostalgia. I don’t even pay attention to the lyrics if I’m being honest. I’m listening to it right now with a soft smile on my face as I write this post. I now try to find comfort in where I am in life rather than trying to get somewhere to be happy. This is something that older folks have told me for years but I never listened. I’m nowhere near done working towards my dreams, But I’m not counting on my dreams to make me happy. Making music makes me happy so why not be happy. The money will come as long as I continue to plan and be smart about my moves. Like the song says “the more money we come across the more problems we see” (I think that the right lyric? Please correct me if I’m wrong). Not all problems are bad problems to have. I see me having little income as a good problem to have because, with my free time, I can practice, learn, read, and create much more than I ever have been able to in the past. Once I start generating income again, I’m sure I’ll have more problems as I’ll have to pay taxes and pay for even more expensive studio time and whatnot. I can wait to have mo problems. Bring it on! 

Excuse of the week 

It’s cold outside 

Last week I started waking up at 5 AM. I’ve accomplished this two times this week so far and with fewer and fewer complaints. I still have a long way to go however, I’ve already broken some personal records of consistency. I now want to get back into working out but it’s kinda cold outside. I don’t want to get sick from being outside in the cold. 

SERIOUSLY KARI? “it’s coooold outside? Ya don’t wanna get siiiiick.” You don’t complain about the cold when you walk to the deli to get a hero (a large sandwich) and soda and candy and coffee! Work out inside you dope! You bought weights for a reason. Start lifting and squatting from now. Go outside and jump rope for 10 minutes. 10 minutes AIN’T that long KARI! These excuses are making you look weak in front of your readers. Oh, you have not readers? Maybe if you weren’t such a baby about going outside for TEN minutes, you’d have more readers! 

All that being said, I’m getting better though. And that is the most important thing here. 

Blessings of the week 

This week I was blessed with good health, and nutritious food (Ramen with frozen steamed veggies ). I was able to overcome my addiction to sleep two times and wake up at 5 AM. I was blessed this week to be able to reach out to friends about potentially selling custom t-shirts and making my handwriting into a font. My greatest blessing of this week was being able to find comfort in where I am in life. I am 23 years old and not yet where I had imagined being in life, however, I understand God’s plan is bigger than me and my grandest dreams. I am right where I am supposed to be. I am happy.

Works Cited (kinda)

In this post I referenced;

• The Notorious B.I.G. aka Biggie Smalls and his song "Mo Money mo problems" ft. Diddy and Maze

• Miscellaneous- I'm sure I only referenced Biggie in this post, but if I mentioned something else, just be glad you were in the same post as The Notorious B.I.G., to begin with.  Humble ya self

Karina A. Harris

Prof. Life

Entry #2

8 January 2021

It's been exactly one month since I turned 23

Thought of the Week 

I think Steve Harvey might have said this at one point or maybe some other bald dude, but I heard that rich people don’t sleep 8 hours a week. 

I have also heard that sleep is for the weak. (Maybe from like, "Sparta" or something IDK. My brothers like to quote A LOT, and I don't care to ask what they're talking about usually so bare with me)

I also hear that when my dad was in the army, he only slept at most 6 hours a day and even then, it wasn’t all at once. What’s my thought of this week? Sleep is overrated. I sleep SO MUCH. I remember back in high school, I was straight KILLING IT. Why?  I didn’t stress about sleep all that much. I slept when I was tired and that’s it. I looked forward to sleeping BECAUSE I was tired from tackling my problems. Now, I sleep to hide from my problems. I’m getting better though. On an average day, I (used to) sleep from about 2 am, to about 4 pm in the afternoon (yes I said 4 pm in the afternoon to stress how bad it was). That’s like 14 hours a day yo! And I still felt exhausted. But it was a weird kind of exhausted. My body hurt, my head was cloudy, and I didn’t care about ANYTHING until about 9:00 at night. Then I got myself up and I worked on music for maybe 3 hours until I convinced myself I can do more tomorrow. Then I’d watch Netflix and turn up until 2 Am. At this point, I would then think “hmm, maybe I’ll wake up early tomorrow and get up by 8 AM!” so now I go to sleep motivated and ready to go; keep in mind it's like 3 am at this point. I set 5 different alarms so I can get up by 8 am.

zzzzzzzzz time passes.

Now it’s 8 am and Depression Kitty is purring on my chest (Big Mouth season 3). (Netflix, please don't sue me. I love your show so much. That’s why I’m referencing “Big Mouth.”) I press snooze every 20 minutes until 1 pm! Let me circle back to that real quick in case you missed the gravity of my situation. I woke up at 8 am! AND I PUSHED SNOOZED EVERY 20 MINUTES UNTIL 1 pm! This happened almost every single day people! At 1 pm I said “eff it” and I hit “dismiss” on my phone and went back to sleep until 4 pm. I’m getting better though. This morning (1/6/2021), I woke up at 5 am! Granted, I stayed awake until about 8 Am then went back to sleep until 1 pm, I still woke up and stayed up. Tomorrow I plan to wake up at 5 am again and try even harder to reach my goals and complete my to-do list. I have an addiction to sleep. But I’m working on it. 

Song and Lyric of the Week 

“I’m going through changes” 

I first heard this lyric in Eminem’s song “Going through Changes” in his Recovery album. Em (and I assume Dr. Dre...BTW, I heard you got sick recently Sir. I am praying for you) used a sample from a 70’s band called Black Sabbath and their song “Changes.” The song struck a chord in my heart way back in 2012. I found it odd that a successful, grown a** man like Em would be going through anything. I felt for Eminem and even came to a realization that everybody goes through changes; even my own parents and adult figures in my life. It was then that I started to realize that “going through it” doesn’t ever really stop. It just gets replaced by something else. It might get replaced by something positive or negative, but I guess that’s the gamble of life. That’s what makes it exciting. You climb over one mountain not knowing if the next mountain you climb is gonna greet you with butterflies and unicorn dust, or if it's gonna suck. The best part was climbing the mountain and look back to say "huh? it wasn't that bad. I mean I survived. I'm here." 

I then heard the same lyric again in 2020 as the opening theme song in “Big Mouth,” a show I really like but do not advise anyone to watch with their parents. I read on the internet that “Big Mouth” used the same song as Eminem, only they used Charles Bradley’s cover instead of the original. Look at that full circle man! When I was 14 and everything started getting weird, I listened to Eminem’s take on the sample and it helped me through the changes I myself was going through. Now that I’m in my 20’s ( and going through a new set of changes), a different version of the song has surfaced and I got to learn that everyone is constantly going through changes. Coincidentally enough I talk about the inevitability of going through changes in life in my song “Going Through it Pt2” (don’t ask about pt 1). This was the first song I ever officially released. This song was done entirely by me (Along with the moral support of my roommates and friends). I did not even send the song to get mastered or anything. I did everything myself production, vocals, lyrics, editing everything. I felt proud of myself (and a little depressed at the time, but mostly proud). I was proud of the song of course, but I am most proud of myself looking back. I almost gave up music. The day I wrote that song, I knew I would never (with the power inside of me and God’s will) ever give up on my music again.

Excuse of the Week 

"I’m tired"

As you read above in “Thought of the week” I’m addicted to sleep. It’s a real thing! I don’t care what anyone says! Sleep is addictive; prove me wrong! My excuse lately has been that I just need more sleep than most people. HA! Wake up, Kari! You are not special, kid! You are a fresh 23-year-old with a goal that millions of other people also want. They aren’t sleeping! Or maybe they are IDK and IDC! Sleeping isn’t going to get you to the studio! Sleeping isn’t going to write your songs! Sleeping isn’t going to promote your songs. You need to do these things and the only way to do them is by being AWAKE! You can sleep when you are actually tired. Not because some stupid depression kitty keeps rubbin up on ya. You are stronger than that! And if you aren’t, then GET stronger. 

Challenge of the Week 

Ok, so this week I decided to wake up at 5 Am every day so I can get out of and away from my addiction to sleep. Honestly, I’ve been low key, killing it! I mean I have yet to stay awake all day but two out of three days I’ve gotten up at 5 and today (1/8/21) I stayed up until 10 am. The first time I only stayed up until 8 Am before I crashed (see the thought of the week). That is called progress people! Next week, I challenge myself to get up and stay up 3 days in a row. I’ll let you know how it goes.

I also challenge you to try something you’ve been sitting on for 3 days in a row as well. Maybe you wanna go to bed before midnight or cook instead of ordering food. Whatever it is, make sure you set yourself up for success and challenge excuses before you are able to use them. For example, before I went to bed last night, I put some food in the crockpot. The catch was that I had to add the beans in two hours before the slow cook ended. I set it up so that at 5 am I needed to get up and out of bed to put the beans in. It worked yo! Let me know how it goes? Or don’t it is your choice. 

Blessings of the Week 

This week I feel blessed to have been able to keep this blog up for two weeks! (not exact;y 7 days apart but I still did it!) I don’t know how many of you are reading this but I feel blessed for you as well. I feel most blessed for being able to wake up at 5 am 2/3 mornings and actually stay up for a moment. I read my book, I did some bible study on my own and I made a plan for my meal prep and cooked it AND ATE IT! I feel blessed to have made it to 2021 with good health and to have made it back home to New York safely with a productive mindset.

Cheers,

theStud3nt

Works Cited (kinda)

In this post, I referenced:

• Depression Kitty from "Big Mouth," a show on Netflix created by Nick Kroll and others.
• Black Sabbath, a 70's band, and their song "Changes"
• Eminem and Dr. Dre who I hope is feeling better after getting sick recently
• Steve Harvey or some other bald guy
• Sparta, a movie I think (again I really didn't care to ask)
• Miscellaneous, if I missed something it's cuz I'm lazy, not evil.

If you want to learn more about the things I referenced then look it up using Google or Bing or something. I'm trying out this Works Cited thing this week and it might not ever make a comeback. Ok good talk.